Happy birthday, Sarah
by AAB
Summary: It's Mac's birthday but it soesn't seem to become a happy one


**Happy birthday, Sarah**

_Friday; lunchtime  
Washington  
Two days before Mac's birthday  
_Major S. MacKenzie hastened her steps. She didn't have much time and quite some things to do. She checked her list for the next errand. Right, that would be the dry cleaner's. Next turn left and then the third or fourth shop on the right. Focussed on her task she almost missed it. But then there it was again, the sound of a familiar voice. She turned around to locate the source and then she saw him. Her co-worker slash best friend Harmon Rabb jr. For a second she wondered what he was doing here. She had assumed he was on an investigation, missing him that morning in the office. He hadn't mentioned being in Washington. She shrugged; it was not that he had to answer to her about his whereabouts.  
But then she saw the woman hanging on his arm. She was blond, long-legged and smiling up to him. And he was smiling back down on her. She heard him laugh over something she said and then they disappeared in the crowd.  
Mac stood rooted to the ground, staring at the point she last saw Harm and his companion. She didn't notice the rushing people around her, forced to set a step aside or nearly bumping into her_. _Finally she managed to get herself to move again but, errands forgotten, her thoughts were with her friend and the woman. A blonde long-legged woman, just his type.

_Friday afternoon  
JAG office  
_Laughter came from a little group at the copier in the corner. Harriet told Mac about something little AJ had said the previous evening and Bud stood next to her, grinning from ear to ear with pride.  
Lieutenant Loren Singer joined the group and the air chilled noticeable. No one liked the woman who always had a sneer ready. She pretended not to notice the others' uneasiness and stirred her coffee once more before sipping it. After Harriet finished her story she asked innocently "did anyone see commander Rabb? I like to schedule a meeting about a plea-bargain." Bud and Harriet shook their heads, Mac didn't even bother. The other woman shrugged. "Well, I guess he is too busy then." No one bothered to answer that.  
"By the way, do you know what his new girlfriend is called? You know, tall, slim, long fair hair in a ponytail," Loren asked innocently. "I saw them coming out of jeweller's store yesterday evening. They seemed very close."  
Mac shrugged like it was no big deal. "I'm sure Harm will tell us ... if there is something to tell." With a smile she hoped didn't look as fake as she knew it was she excused herself and disappeared into her own office. She sat and tried to focus on the case she was working on.  
It was only moments later when Harriet bolted in. "Don't let that snake upset you, Ma'am. You know she does it on purpose. Even if she has seen the commander with a woman, I'm sure there's a perfect explanation for it."  
Mac nodded. "I'm sure you're right."  
Harriet went to work again but Mac flopped back in her chair and buried her face in her hands. A perfect explanation! She almost snorted.  
Because Harriet didn't know Mac had seen him with the woman, too.  
That that image was burned into her retina. The woman looking exactly like Loren described.  
That they hadn't seen her, their attention fully focussed on each other.  
That she had looped her arm through his like it belonged there.  
That she had seen them later, kissing before she stepped into a taxi and Harm courteously closed the door before waving her out.  
There had to be an explanation! There had to!  
Her phone went off. She smiled when she saw the number on the display. Harm! But her smile quickly faded when he started to talk. "Mac, I'm sorry but I have to cancel out movie night tonight. I'm stuck. I explain later and I'll make up for it. Promise!" What else could she do than accept and wish him a nice evening.

_Saturday  
The day before Mac's birthday  
_That Saturday she tried to call him. Several times. But every time his phone went straight to voicemail. She didn't know whether to be happy or sad about it. She didn't leave a message though. If nothing was wrong, he would be very surprised she called knowing he would be there first thing in the morning. And for the sake of her life, she didn't know what to say if he asked. If there was someone… well, she had her pride. She wouldn't beg.  
In the afternoon she went shopping. She needed groceries, after all a human had to eat, and drinks and munchies for her birthday.  
She bought juices, a cake and some nibbles for she knew Bud, Harriet and little AJ would visit the next afternoon but the idea of visitors didn't appeal to her.  
She bought a flowering plant to bring some colour and festivity but her heart wasn't in it.  
She bought enough food for two but her stomach churned at the thought of eating.  
She … she just had to accept things the way they were.

In the evening she went to bed at her usual time and took her book to read a few pages. Then she flipped out the lights and waited for sleep to come. It didn't. In stead her thoughts started to wander to a conversation they had three years earlier.  
Somehow the conversation had turned towards birthdays. It was only days before her 29th birthday and Harm was happy to share some of his memories. He spoke fondly about his fifth birthday, the last one his dad spent with them. They had eaten out, visited an arcade and his dad gave him two airplane models. They had made them together, the last ones he made with his dad before Harm sr. was sent on what was to become his last mission. He proudly showed he still had them. The next years his birthdays hadn't been so cheerful but even then his mum had done her best to make them days to remember. Sometimes they were at the farm in Bellville and he loved to celebrate with his summertime friends there. Run around, play games and eat as much ice-cream and cake as they could lay their hands on. After his mum had married Frank Burnett, he too had made sure to add to the fun as much as he could.  
Mac hadn't much to tell about her childhood birthdays. Those had been days as usual and were best forgotten as soon as possible. In fact, she tried not to mention them in front of her teacher or classmates because there were no presents to show, no treats and no parties.  
Mac smiled remembering Harms reaction. He had been genuinely shocked and she could see the little gears in his head turning. But nothing had prepared her for his next action.  
The morning of her birthday she woke up with the distinct feeling someone had entered her home. As quietly as she could she rose, grabbed her sidearm from the bed stand drawer and sneaked into her living. No one! But in the kitchen she heard noises. On her tiptoes she approached the door, throwing it wide open, pointing her gun and yelling "hands where I can see then" before she realised _who _she was pointing a gun at and _who_ she was yelling at. Harm!  
He had jumped, turned in a flash and kept his hands next to him, clearly visible.  
Mac had been flabbergasted. "What are you doing here?" she had all but yelled.  
By now his hands were lowered again. "Making you breakfast," he explained. "I thought, since you never had a proper birthday-breakfast-in-bed it would be nice to make you one." It had been so sweet of him, she almost cried.  
She recalled how she had gone back to bed, anxiously waiting for him to come with a tray with coffee, juice, a soft boiled egg, buns and croissants with strawberry jam. And a glass with daisies. They had eaten together and afterwards he had given her her birthday present. They had been late that morning.  
The next year she knew what to expect. She had already been wide awake at five and waiting. Waiting with bated breath till she heard his key in the lock. It had been hash browns and sausage patties and only God knew where he had picked up daffodils.  
Last year he had made an English breakfast with mushrooms, tomatoes, sausages, baked beans, bacon and eggs, toast and marmalade. A small orchid in a crystal vase served as decoration.  
For a moment she wondered with what he would come up this year. Then it hit her again full force. He most likely was not coming at all. He probably was spending the weekend somewhere else, with someone else.  
She tried to remember when it had been before that she felt so … so not expecting anything and realized it must have been shortly before Christmas in the year she turned seven. She just found out, probably by children from her class that Santa Claus was not real, that he was just made up by grown ups. She had shared this discovery with her mum and the woman had only nodded. "That is true."  
That evening she overheard her mum telling her dad who had said "Just as good. Saves us the money and trouble to buy presents. There are more important things." And she had known what those more important things were. Booze and lots of it. She then knew for sure she meant less to her dad than the drinks. And indeed, it had been the first of many Christmases and birthdays without a present, except for second hands cloths and school stuff she needed anyway.  
The years Harm had made sure she had a real birthday had been balm on her wounded soul. And now this seemed to come to an end as well. She buried her head in he pillow, fighting her tears. It wasn't she was entitled to his attention…  
It was 4.30 am when she finally fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

_7 am, Sunday morning  
Mac's apartment  
_At 7am the door slowly opened. Harm sneaked in, juggling two large bags and bouquet of roses and careful not to make any sound. Not that he would fool her, she probably was wide awake already but enjoying their little game. He remembered the first time he did, three years ago. A couple of days before they had had a chat about birthdays and he had learned hers had been a normal day, each year. No congratulations, no presents, nothing special. A day you hoped the teacher would not mention. A day to keep silent, for there would be no treats for her fellow scholars.  
That very moment he had vowed to himself he would make her next birthday a special one. Hence sneaking into her apartment to make her breakfast. He hadn't counted with her sharp hearing and caution though. In the middle of putting the food he brought on the counter he had felt a gun in his back and heard a cold voice saying "turn around slowly."  
He smiled. After that it had become a tradition, making her breakfast on her birthday. A tradition, he was sure, they both enjoyed.  
Preparations almost completed Harm carefully peeked into Mac's bedroom. Good, his first thought was. She was still asleep. Then he frowned. It wasn't like Mac not to wake up when someone else was in the house. Even if it was him.  
A bit worried he walked back to the kitchen to retrieve the tray with Mac's birthday breakfast. He already arranged a bowl of freshly cut melon on it, a glass orange juice and a flower. He bit his lip a bit nervously. Maybe a red rose was giving away too much. But no way to change that now. The large bouquet he brought were also red roses mixed with baby breath.  
He added a mug of coffee and a plate with French toast and carefully made his way back. Not singing loudly as he had done the previous two years but afraid to startle his still sleeping friend he softly hummed "happy birthday to you" slowly increasing his volume.  
From the depths of her sleep Mac heard a sound. At first she couldn't indentify it, then realized it was humming, then slowly started to recognize the tune. By now Harm was standing next to her bed and when she opened her eyes she looked into his face, holding a warm smile.  
But to his confusion and shock she didn't smile. Instead she started to cry. Bewildered he looked around how to get rid of the tray, then dumped it unceremoniously on the drawer. The next second he was sitting next to Mac who was still sobbing, her face in her hands. He softly pulled her in his arms and she didn't resist.  
"Honey, ssst. It's okay. It's just me. Sweetheart, what's wrong? Did I startle you?"  
Mc couldn't utter a word. She silently shook her head. Harm knew nothing better than to let her calm down, whispering reassuring words. Finally her sobs subdued.  
"Mac?" Harm softly asked.  
But again she shook her head. She couldn't find the words to tell him she hadn't expected him nor could she explain she was so upset because she had thought he had a new girlfriend.  
"I'm sorry," she whispered.  
Harm pulled her close again, pressing a kiss on the crown of her head. Finally she heaved a sigh and pulled back. She blushed. Harm stood up. "I'm going to reheat your French toast and pour you a fresh cup of coffee," he announced. This gave Mac the opportunity to slip into the bathroom and wash her face. Then she crawled back into the bed.  
In the meantime Harm was wondering what had happened. But knowing she wouldn't tell until she was ready to share he let it slip for the time being. Then he walked back, an extra mug of coffee on the tray. Inside the bedroom he placed the tray on Mac's lap and sat himself next to her once more. He leaned in to give her a soft kiss. "Happy birthday, Sarah." Mac had to blink to avoid a fresh batch of tears.  
After breakfast, Mac generously sharing her food with him, he announced she was to take a shower and he would make some more French toast. After that she could open her presents.  
Second serving of French toast gone he presented her first with the bouquet of roses. She hid her face in it, pretending to smell the fragrance. But in fact she was confused; he never had given her roses, let alone red ones.  
Then there was a small box in his hand, beautifully wrapped in dark blue paper and adorned with a golden bow. It contained a gorgeous set of earrings, in the form of little roses carved out of a pink gem. Mac was stunned. She hadn't expected such a delicate and expensive gift.  
The third thing on the table was an envelope. Opening it Mac found tickets to the musical Cats, a musical she had wanted to see for a long time, and the promise of a dinner in a restaurant of her choice to start with.  
Wide-eyed she looked at Harm. "Is this a date?" she asked almost inaudible.  
Harm swallowed nervously. "Yes. If you want it to be." He waited with bated breath.  
Slowly Mac nodded. "Yes," she whispered. "Yes," she said in a louder voice. Suddenly she wrapped her arms around him, pressing her face in the crook of his neck.  
"I wanted this for so long," she said in a strangled voice. "I was so afraid …" She felt silent.  
'Now we're coming to it' Harm thought. "You were afraid … of what?" he asked softly. He didn't want to put any pressure on her.  
"I was afraid I was losing you," Mac sighed. "I saw you yesterday, with that blond woman. And Loren saw you coming out of a jeweller's shop with her."  
"And wasted no time in telling you," Harm concluded.  
Mac shook her head. "No, and then you cancelled our evening. And your phone was on voicemail all day long." She blushed knowing she sounded like a controlling and jealous wife.  
"I'm sorry," Harm apologized. "I didn't think it would take that long. First, the woman you saw me with is my cousin Linda. I told you about her; she is the daughter of Frank's sister. She and her husband were victims of a car accident six months ago. He is still in a wheelchair. Friday was their day in court but their lawyer suffered a minor heart attack and wasn't able to represent them. So she came to me for help and the Admiral graciously gave me the day off. Hearing the case the opposite party was prepared to settle after all so I spend yesterday all day long negotiating. They got a much better agreement than expected," he ended a bit smug. "She was helping me to find a gift for you. She saw these earrings in a jeweller's window and knew we have a history with roses. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you."  
Mac hugged him once more. "It's okay. I should have asked you instead jumping to conclusions. It's me who should apologize."  
He shook his head. "I should have told you." He frowned. "Explaining is not my strongest point, I'm afraid." He gave her a rueful smile "At least it would have saved you a miserable day."  
She placed her hand against his cheek. "Don't beat yourself up." At this moment she was only plain happy he was here with her. That there was no other woman. That her dream still was possible.  
Without thinking she lifted her face and leaned in in a silent invitation to him to kiss her. He did. Softly his lips landed on hers. He trailed kisses from her mouth to the soft skin under her ear and back again before pulling back. The intensity of his stare told her he was about to say something important.  
"You don't have to be afraid to lose me, for I don't want to lose you! Ever!" He hesitated a second. "Because I love you. I'm in love with you."  
For long moments Mac could only look at him. Then she tentatively touched his face. "You are?" she asked in awe. He nodded giving her the time to let his words sink in. At last her arms came around his neck.  
"I love you, too,' she sighed.  
He leaned in to kiss her again but stopped at the last moment. "Happy birthday, Sarah."  
Mac smiled blissfully. It _was_ a happy birthday. And there were many more to come. Of that she was sure now.

The end


End file.
